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Worlds Colliding: Our Engagement Party

                                                                                2 Saturdays ago, Ravi & I hosted our engagement party.  It's funny but we didn't know the first thing about throwing an engagement party - what's the protocol?  Do we only invite people who we intend to invite to the wedding or can we widen our net?  After much consultation with friends who had travelled this path before we were informed that we should only invite the people we intend on inviting to the wedding (or else it's like a story without a climax/conclusion for the guests who are invited to the engagement party only). 

Another funny thing - even though Ravi & I had already decided that our wedding party would be 100-strong, for some reason it didn't occur to us that we would be inviting that same number of people to the engagement party!  Our place was packed, fit to burst, full of the chatter & laughter of people from different chapters in our lives - ergo, different worlds colliding.  In addition to my family & relatives, we had friends from current & previous jobs, uni friends, poker friends, high school friends, theatre friends.  Highlights of the party were:

• Seeing people from different worlds mingling with each other
• Great catching up with friends who I haven't physically seen in months (thank God for email & sms!)
• A tribe of kids & toddlers had taken over the third floor with the Xbox & pay tv - babies were a big theme of the night - you were either holding one, admiring another one or sustaining one in your belly
• My mum, Captain Booger Features & I preparing the spring rolls together (the captain says the funniest things when he's gabbing with the gals!)
• Food!  So much food!  Even though we had a waitress serving food to guests for most of the night we still had leftovers for days afterwards!
• Su coming despite the night being her wedding anniversary (I love your priorities, girl!)
• The pile of unexpected engagement gifts on a side table - in particular, a mock ball & chain by Sylvia, Tung & Joss

Ravi, Captain Booger Features & I just want to thank everyone who attended for coming, for the presents & for making it such a fun & memorable celebration!  I big hug & kiss goes to my Mum who slaved over a hot stove all afternoon cooking the delicious Filipino dishes & for Tita Belinda who made her yummy empanadas - the dishes from my Mum & Tita Belinda were all gone by the end of the night!  Thanks to Tung, Sylvia & Joss for coming early to help out too.  It was a great party - worthy of being the last party we throw in this place we've called home for 3 years (we're moving to another place soon - very exciting!).  More photos are in the "Engagement party 2007" album.

Funny marriage quotes

While designing our engagement party invites, I thought I'd add a few marriage quotes that summed up the occasion.  Some good ones that also summed up Ravi & my personalities were:

• "Love at first sight is easy to understand; it's when two people have been looking at each other for a lifetime that it becomes a miracle."  (Amy Bloom)
• "My husband and I have never considered divorce . . . . murder sometimes, but never divorce."  (Joyce Brothers)
• "If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married."  (Katherine Hepburn)
• "I think men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage.  They've experienced pain and bought jewellery."  (Rita Rudner)

Love it!

Picture originally uploaded by Myriad Sketch.

I've found my dress!

Actually, it's more like the dress found me, or stalked me.  I saw a picture of it in a magazine a number of weeks ago.  Then I saw it again on display at the Bridal expo in Darling Harbour.  I signed up for a fitting and last Saturday I tried on the dress.  I made it a family affair by inviting my mum & my 2 aunties to help me decide.  I loved it!  They loved it!  I was a bit nervous about picking the only dress I had actually tried on so I tried on 3 more dresses.  The last dress came closest to unseating the first dress from poll position in my consideration set - almost but not enough.  The first dress won by a landslide.  The design and style is totally me - a little funky, a little different, splash of dramatic colour.  I ended up getting a veil too.  I could totally see myself wearing this every day, Miss-Havisham-style ("Great Expectations" by Charles Dickens).  I felt princess-like wearing so many layers, folds, and a misty sheath over my head & shoulders.  It was also surprisingly heavy.

While I was trying on dresses, Ravi was waiting in the car.  Thinking it would take us ages to finish up, he started scoping the area and found a massage place.  A few minutes into the massage, I called telling him we were done.  He was spewing (hehe) that his half-hour massage only lasted a few minutes.  His exact words were: "It's like tasting a delicious ice cream and not being able to finish it."  I offered to wait for him until he was done but he came to pick us up anyway.  We all ended up having yummy yumcha at a restaurant near my aunty's house (pictured).

Bought my 1st bridal mag ever!

I bought my first stack of bridal magazines ever!  It was strange buying them.  I was never one of those girls who fantasised about getting married when I was little.  Not that there is anything wrong with that but it just wasn't something I daydreamed about.  I preferred to daydream about being a judge & sentencing a criminal to 20 years in prison or being a pop star. 

As Ravi & I rifled through the bridal magazines it became very evident that as far as print media is concerned, the wedding is really all about the wedding dress!  90% of the magazines we looked at were just glossy colour photos of pouty brides in glamourous dresses.  I was suddenly reminded of Miss Havisham in Charles Dickens' "Great Expectations."  When Pip (the hero) met old Miss Havisham she was in her wedding dress, dirty & frayed from 40+ years of non-stop wear after she vowed never to take it off when she was jilted at the altar.  But there is one magazine we bought that is actually a Sydney directory on everything involving weddings - dresses, suits, flowers, cars, the cake, reception venues, gifts, etc.  Nothing like conducting research to get a market researcher excited!

Picture originally uploaded by melodrama.ca

Who's the ball & who's the chain?

What do the following things have in common: Gold Coast, midnight, Sofitel, snoring, mosquitoes, "Back to Disco," pink pyjamas, 1603, "The Fountainhead," diamond ring?  They all played a part in making last Saturday night/Sunday morning one of the most memorable moments of my life - the night Ravi & I got engaged! 

Picture this scene . . . . Ravi & I were sitting outside on the balcony of our Sofitel room, admiring the view of the city lights and Broadbeach surf while reading.  It was a balmy night and the bugs were out in force, dancing by the balcony lights despite our height from the 16th floor (room 3).  Our ears were treated to a symphony of '70s tunes and drunken whoops from real estate agents on the 3rd floor who were enjoying their conference dinner, themed "back to disco."  Captain Booger Features' rhythmic snoring added to the night's recital.  I took stock and thought, 'Life is good.'  I was engrossed in "The Fountainhead" by Ayn Rand (one of the most excellent books I have ever read!) when I couldn't help but notice Ravi's eyes repeatedly darting my way.  Thinking he was checking to see if I had fallen asleep, I forced my sleepy eyes wide-open ('I can outlast him (yawn)!').  Then he suddenly announced, "I have a present for you."  I love presents so I nudged my chair closer to his in anticipation.  He turned away momentarily, then turned back to face me with a question, "Will you marry me?"  And there it was.  A sparkling diamond ring on his pinky finger.  I was completely shocked!  Normally I can read Ravi like a book but I've been a bit self-absorbed in the past couple of weeks because of work (believe me, work knows I'm blaming them for that) so I completely missed it.  What is amazing is the fact that Ravi (who admits to not being a 'details' person) was able to organise this under my nose without attracting my suspicion.  I was so surprised that my first reaction to his question was, "How did you organise this without me finding out?"  For the next 5 minutes he proceeded to give me an account of how he executed this operation surreptitiously.  Then, realising something was amiss he said, "You know, you still haven't answered my question."  I said "Yes," and from that moment Ravi became my fiance and that diamond ring found its home on my ring finger.

When Captain Booger Features woke up the next morning, we told him the good news.  He took it in his stride like Joe Cool.  Surprised at his cool-ness, I said, "You don't seem very excited."  He replied in an exasperated manner like he was talking to Tweedledum, "But I already knew about it, Mum."  You see, Ravi had taken the captain to see the ring a week earlier.  I realised that Ravi had achieved the impossible by getting the captain to keep it a secret (Captain Booger Features is not known for keeping secrets for very long).

So begins our journey to the altar.  Such an adult decision for us to make!  In many respects I still feel like I'm in my 20s, hoping the captain grows up to be a happy & responsible adult despite my amateurish parental skills (thankfully, Ravi seems to know what he's doing), hoping work never finds out I'm actually fluking it (for all my career-life, actually), etc.  But there are these moments, decisions where you are aware of its life-changing gravity at the time when you make them, when you feel life is wonderful and powering along a course that promises happiness, passion, accomplishment and surprises, despite your best efforts to stick to a conventional life plan.

Some congratulatory sms's & phone messages from friends:

"Wow!  That's so great!  Congratulations C & R!"

"Congratulations.  That is so fantastic.  I could see it coming!  Got a date set 4 the big day?"

"This is great news!  We can be couple buddies!" (Friend is also engaged.)

"About bloody time!"

"That is just fantastic.  Ur lucky to find such a hot guy  :)  He is super mega lucky!" (Running joke with friend that I'm more better-looking than Ravi - friend plays devil's advocate just to stir me!  Everyone knows I'm more better-looking than Ravi!)

"I'm so happy for both of you!  You are made for each other."

"No way?  Congratulations!  So, is it too early to ask - when is the party?"

"Congratulations.  When r we having champers?"

"Are you financially in trouble or mentally ill?  What would possess you to get engaged?  Call me!"  (Friend is also engaged.)

Picture originally uploaded by redjen.