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11 Fights & We Were Outta There!

  So Ravi & I went to the Mundine fight.  I was attracted by the fact that I had never witnessed a live boxing match before & it was to be Mundine's first fight since the unfortunate encounter between his contact lens & his tongue (resulting in near-blindness & the prospect of never fighting again).  But no-one told me that I had to sit through 10 fights before his match!

It wasn't so bad.  My goal was to see at least 1 knockout & some blood.  The 1st 6 fights were dull.  I never realised Thailand was breeding so many would-be boxers!  The ones I saw were lousy.  Especially one who tripped over the rope when he tried to jump into the ring (falling flat on his face) & then having the biggest wind-up ever whenever he was about to land a punch.  Talk about signalling intent!

The 2nd-last fight was the best.  Solomon Haumono (ex-NRL player) was poetry in motion, coming into the match with 12 fights - all won by him by knockout!  He didn't disappoint.  He gave me the first knockout of the night & gave a very humble victory speech afterwards.  Tall poppy syndrome is still far in his future.

Finally Mundine came on - at 11:20pm!  Thankfully his fight lasted only 4 rounds when he won by knockout.  As soon as the bell sounded everyone in the arena high-tailed it outta there, not even waiting to hear his victory speech (which was repeated ad nauseum in the news - oh, how the media love overt arrogance!).  Overall, I was satisfied with the night.  I got what I came to see & I'd probably watch another fight if the boxers were well-known & reputed to be good.  I can certainly see the appeal of watching 1 man knock another man to the ground in a controlled environment where both parties are prepared for the pummelling they may encounter.

O Happy Day for Ginger Kids!

  Mick married Karen in a traditional Catholic ceremony on a day filled with sunshine & smiles - how come weddings always seem to be bathed in golden light?  Karen looked gorgeous in her white wedding gown & Mick looked very dapper in his 3-piece wedding suit.  Ravi & Nate (always stirring trouble when priests are nearby - especially Catholic priests) wanted me to go up to the priest when he was handing out the Eucharist because the pagans I was sitting with in the back were hungry & they heard the priest was handing out 'crackers!' 

For the reception at the Queen Victoria Building Tea Room, Ravi & I were put on the loud table (again! - right next to the band) where I was re-united with all my ol' Sharman Networks buddies.  Whilst eating dinner, drinking wine, laughing at the speeches, toasting the happy couple & dancing to '90s hits, the Australian public made history by changing the governing political party.  Kevin07!

WWE Fans: a different class of human

                                                                               Ravi & I took one of his work colleagues to a World Wrestling Entertainment event at Acer Arena.  I got the tickets through work & had always wanted to see what the big deal was.  I know that the whole thing is bogus but when I saw the real thing for the first time I was puzzled as to why most fans believe the fights are real.  Didn't the exaggerated punches that stop short of contact give it away?  Or are they fooled by the imperfectly synchronised foot-stomping after the huge wind-up before the punch to air?

The biggest thing that shocked me came in the form of an angelic girl of 6 sitting with her normal-looking (that is, no piercings in areas outside of earlobes, no brandings on the face, etc.) parents & 2 brothers sitting in the row before us.  She had golden hair & a sweet voice as she raised her hands in the devil's sign & shouted, "You're a wanker!  You're a wanker!" to a wrestler in the ring who was spraying the crowd with water from his mouth!  (I thinking th term for that is spitting!)  Her parents cheered her on!  I cringed thinking about what kind of person that sweet-looking girl would become....all class, I bet.  Or better yet, Captain Booger Features' Friday night date 7 years from now!

Even at 32 I'm still going to 21st's

                                                                                My cousin turned 21 & celebrated by throwing a big party themed in honour of his hero, Michael Jackson.  I never saw so many MJ lookalikes, cubic-zirconia studded gloves & greasy afro wigs!  I had a great time despite having to become impromptu master of ceremonies for the speeches.  It was also funny watching Mark's friends dust off their black & white brogues & bust a breakdance on floor!

Peter Marries His Girl-Friday

I've never attended a wedding which required me to take an afternoon off work but I did just that when Lauren married Peter.  It was a gorgeous sunny Friday afternoon when they exchanged vows at the Botannical Gardens in front of a stustue of a mare & her foal, their family & friends - & encroaching Asian tourists with their digital cameras.  It was with a mixture of happiness (for Lauren & Peter) & naughtiness (for taking the afternoon off of work) that we watched them recite their own vows & kissed to seal the deal.

Reception was at Dalton House.  Ravi & I were put on the loud table (that always happens to us - maybe that's why we always have such a fun time at weddings).  We had loads of fun chatting with the interesting company on our table (a young married couple from Perth on their 1st trip to Sydney, a young unmarried couple - a lawyer & a builder - moving to Dubai, & the boyfriend of the bridesmaid) & boogeying to '80s tracks.

Mr Forgetful takes care of it

Funny thing happened when Mr. Hyde resigned.  We had invited Mr. Hyde to come back to the office for Friday night drinks where we would present him with his farewell gift & card for his 7 years of service.  Racked with guilt for the part I played in his resignation, I offered to go out & purchase his farewell gift & card but Mr. Forgetful said, "Don't worry about it.  It's taken care of."  That was Thursday.  On Friday afternoon at 3pm (2 hours before Mr. Hyde was expected to turn up for his farewell drinks), I get a phone call from Mr. Forgetful who was at a meeting offsite.

Mr. Forgetful: Clare, can you do me a favour?
Clare: Sure.  What is it?
Mr. Forgetful: Can you go & get Mr. Hyde's present?
Clare: Are you serious?  It's 3pm!  He's going to be here in 2 hours!  You said it was taken care of!
Mr. Forgetful: It was taken care of.
Clare: How can it be taken care of?  You don't have the present!
Mr. Forgetful: It's taken care of in the sense that it was put on my list of things to do.  But I didn't get a chance to do it.
Clare: Oh, for God's sake!  Do you have the card?
Mr. Forgetful: Oh, you'll need to get that too.  Thanks.
Clare: (Silence)

I ran to the nearest shopping centre, got him a gift voucher, raced to the newsagency, got a big farewell card, ran back to the office & whizzed around the floor getting people to sign it.  Little Miss Fun took the card downstairs to get more farewell messages.  By the time Mr. Hyde arrived, the present was wrapped & the card was signed.

Just when I thought all was well, Little Miss Splendid (Mr. Forgetful's boss) came up to me & asked, "Is Mr. Forgetful here?  He needs to make the speech.  I don't know anything about Mr. Hyde to say anything."  Little Miss Splendid was also giving a farewell speech for another departing employee (Little Miss Happy) & wanted to have both farewell speeches done at the same time, meanwhile Little Miss Happy needed to leave for another function, & Mr. Forgetful was nowhere to be seen - see my dilemma!

I called Mr. Forgetful on his mobile.

Mr. Forgetful: Hello?
Clare: Are you close by?  Little Miss Splendid wants to do the farewell speeches now because Little Miss Happy needs to leave soon.
Mr. Forgetful: I'm in a cab right now.  I should be there in half an hour.
Clare: Are you serious?  Half an hour?  It's 5pm now & you knew Mr. Hyde was going to be here at 5pm.
Mr. Forgetful: But my meeting ran overtime.
Clare: But Little Miss Splendid wants to do the farewell speeches now.
Mr Forgetful: If Little Miss Splendid is happy to do both speeches now, I'm happy for her to be happy & do Mr. Hyde's speech.
Clare: Okay, I'll tell her.  (Hangs up.)
Little Miss Splendid: So, what did he say?
Clare: He said if you're happy to do Mr. Hyde's speech, he's happy for you to do it.
Little Miss Splendid: I'm sure he is, the bastard!
Clare: (!!)
Little Miss Splendid: Quick, give me something I can use in Mr. Hyde's farewell speech!
Clare: Umm, he's worked here for 7 years....Err, he's worked in the marketing team, followed later by a stint with the networks team....Umm, he rides a motorbike....he lives with his mother....
Little Miss Splendid: (!!)

Little Miss Splendid did Mr. Hyde's farewell speech, managing to string along the sparse material I gave her to a full 30 seconds.  Mr. Forgetful arrived just in time to hear the end of it.  When he arrived . . .

Clare: I am going to kill you!
Mr. Forgetful: I'm sorry.  My meeting went overtime.
Clare: I think you need to re-define what 'taken care of' means....

Image originally uploaded by ~BranchDesign.

From Russia . . . with a molotov cocktail

For the first time in my career I became involved in the process of written warnings.  A few months after Little Miss Fun joined my team, a new position was created & an employee (Russian in nationality & culture - let's call him Mr. Hyde) was transferred from his current role (which was made redundant) to the new role.  Prior to this transfer, despite his reputation for being odd, he was always very nice to me.  However, once I became his manager, his attitude towards me changed.  He became argumentative & refused to complete any of the major projects I assigned him ("It wasn't interesting to me."  What the?!)

It became clear that he was not right for the role for the following reasons:

1. His skill set did not match the skill set required for the new role.
2. He was neither flexible nor receptive in considering other research methodologies or analysis tools than what he was familiar with already.
3. He opted for personal convenience at the expense of data/analysis integrity.
4. He did not respect my position as his manager.

I found out later that a sexual harrassment complaint was lodged against him by another employee.  One time when I tried to discuss what problems he had with the role, etc. he responded by banging his hands on his head repeatedly.  And when I looked at his face, it was the face of a man constipated - constipated & angry!  He also made inappropriate comments of a sexual nature to other employees.  It culminated in a meeting with Mr. Odd, Mr. Forgetful (my boss) & Little Miss Helpful (HR manager) & myself where we detailed what the issues with his performance were & outlined the process of this 1st & final warning.  He decided to resign rather than comply with the conditions of his 'parole.'

He also took this opportunity to badmouth me in the meeting, "I've been here 7 years & have built wonderful relationships with people.  Clare has only been here less than a year.  When I'm gone the truth will come out about what Clare is really like....Clare manipulated me into not doing my work!"  (What the?!)  I was gutted.  When Mr. Forgetful & I left the meeting so Little Miss Helpful could go through the resignation process with Mr. Hyde, I shuffled out of the room completely demoralised.  I looked to Mr. Forgetful for any words of encouragement or comfort to lift my spirits, to validate my self-worth as a manager, as a human being.  He hit me with: "Well, that's the end of that," rubbed his hands together (with glee?) & strode off confidently.  Does nothing faze the man?

Mr. Hyde was physically gone from the office 2 days later - after making copies & printouts of his work, & then summarily deleting all his files & emails (despite Little Miss Helpful instructing him not to).  Good thing I had IT sureptitiously copy all his files without his knowledge before he could delete/change anything.

Last I heard was that he was trying to get a job at the company his old boss (who was made redundant) was now working for.  I hope he gets it.  I feel terrible that this happened - & just before Christmas!  I begged Mr. Forgetful to either have Mr. Hyde transferred to another department or if he had to leave, send him off with a redundancy payout (7 years would afford him quite a healthy sum).  But Mr. Forgetful didn't want to lose the extra resource in the team.  As penance, I purchased Mr. Hyde's farewell gift & made sure his farewell card was signed by everyone on the floor (even from the people who didn't know him!).

Image originally uploaded by Dunechaser.

When the cousins come out to play . . . .

                                                                                Ravi's younger cousins, Anthony & Marie, came down to Sydney for a few days from sunny Bris Vegas, specifically to watch the play.  Despite the play being aborted, we still showed them a good time . . . broadway-style:

• Thai dinner at trendy King Street Wharf & a walk along the promenade in Darling Harbour where a Latin festival was in full swing - a band was playing live Latin music & professional Latin dancers were teaching the throbbing throng sensual salsa moves.
• Took them to yum cha since they had never been before - they bravely tasted chicken feet for the first time!
• Introduced them to miniature golf.
• Lunched at teppanyaki bbq - I was the only one who failed to catch my fried rice when the chef threw it at me, resulting in a shower of fried rice & vegies all over my lap!
• Shopping, shopping & more shopping!

They were great fun!  We were all sorry to see them go - especially Captain Booger Features who kept asking, "I wonder what Anthony & Marie are doing now?" after they flew back to Bris Vegas.

The Divine Plan remains a plan - but not for long

Glen Street Theatre announced to their patrons that The Divine Plan was pulled from their schedule due to creative differences between the production company & the writers.

Although having the play pulled was regrettable, the fact that the proposed stage version was different to the script we wrote probably made the decision inevitable.

Watch this space....

The Captain's 9th at the 9th Hole

                                                                               Keeping up with the tradition of birthdays at fun yet different locations, Captain Booger Features celebrated the end of his 9th year (& the start of his 10th year) at Putt-Putt miniature golf range.  While all the kids bashed the golf ball around, the adults also got to play.  It became increasingly evident that everyone's goal was to beat Ravi (funny that Ravi brings that out in people). 

Every one of the adults experienced a hole-in-one during the 2 rounds of 18 holes each.  Gotta say, it's a great feeling seeing that little ball sink in that little hole on the 1st hit!  Equally as great was chowing down on ice cream cake on that hot day.  I love kiddie parties when kids & adults alike have fun . . . .

Pictures located in "CBF 9th bday party" album.